My Beautiful Life...

Hmm.. Somtimes... when thoughts get into ur head... n there r som things in som corner f ur heart which u always wanted 2 do ,,(like saying sorry 2 som 1),,, n they always pop up at som point f time...n at that point u feel helpless...
Achanak se sab yaad aa raha...kya karei...
Pata nahi achanak se kya ho gaya,,itz 3.30Am....
Neend aa nahi rahi
Ulte sedhe khyal aa rahe mann mei..
Lekin ye Khyaal hai kiske..
Shayad Fir se Usi k..
Ye ho jata hai mujhe kabhi kabhi.. itne saare meri batei adhoori reh gai na uske saath ki kabhi kabhi aisa ho jaata hai...
tumko lagega mai pagal ho gaya hun...
but ufff....
Kitna kuch hai Bolne ko... but bolu kya... uska love letter yaad aa raha... uski smile,,,uska hairstyle..dekhne ka dhang... fav colours,,her dance/... Ghoorne ka style...uski cycle...uski fav dress...uska kajal..uski badi ankhen... uski white skirt... uski rangoli... uska key ring... uski boldness...
aur bhi kitni batei hai ab kya kya likhu....
Apni car ka number mujhe nahi yaad,aur itne saal baad bhi uski car ka number nahi bhula....
Yaar.. kitna pure tha sab... ab waise chah k bhi nahi ho paate... usko 10 sec dekne k liy bhari dhoop mei khade rehte the..
Ye dil hi badal gaya itne time mei..waisa pyar hi nahi aa pata ab...
Matlab.... jitna bhi time mile wo kam hi hota tha....
Kal kya baat karni hai ye pehle se sochna aur jake sab bhool jana...tab bhi baaton ka na khtam hona...
Usko tab tak dekhna jab tak wo ekdam door na chali jae...
but itni batei hai mere paas...aur is saal poore 10 saal ho jaenge usko mile..aur kaho ki ek saal pehle walo pe 5 min bhi bol lo to nahi ho paega..(Exceptions r There)..
Aur kya bataun/.///. wo jab hans deti thi na subah subah...sahi bata raha din bhar mere chehre se smile nahi jati thi///.... aur jis din na dikhe bhuk nahi lagti thi
Matlab mai uski ankho mei itna doob k dekta tha ki i never realized ki wo kajal hi lagati hai...,,mere doston ne mujhko dikhaya

"Uske ajebo garib sapne aur concepts..

n yet so clear abt her Life.."

Uski batei..Ice cream khane ka dhang.. koi aur ladki humko dekhe to uska mujhko dekhne ka dhang... uske rone se pehle wo 10 sec ka silence.. pata chal jae ki rone wali hai..
Uska wo bahane se mere gate k samne ruk jana.... janbooch k balcony mei khade hoke mere samne dance karna... badminton khelte hue hamesha shuttle meri taraf marna///... chup k mujhko dekna aur achanak se samne aa jana..
Ab bas karta hun warna batei to kabhi khtam nahi hongi..
Dont think i am hurting myself by thinking so much...still her thought bring only smile to me...
In sab baaton ki wajah ye hai..
ki kitne sapne adhoore reh gae uske sath..... bas wahi yaad aate hai..ki i wish time could go back... to mai uski har khwaish poori kar deta,,..har wo sapna jo wo mere se discuss kia karti thi usko poora kar deta..
Ohh.. now it feels better...itna likhne k baad..
BUt itz still not over..many things r still 2 b written... I knw returning to ma life is not a possibility for her and neither for me...but still her thoughts make my life SO BEAUTIFUL...


WHAT I CAN Say In the end..is sing this song -

"I've Been Living with a shadow Overhead , I've been Sleeping with a Cloud above my Head , I've Been Lonely for so Long , Trapped in the Past I just can't seem to Move On , Just in Case i might just need them again Some day , all want to do is Find my Way back into Love. "